Thanks to the review response from one of Team Beta- She believes that an important piece is missing from my script for the LRWG Lesson #08. I agree, it was inadvertently left out of the scenario- I was going to add it but this would put me beyond the 3,000 word limit. So, I decided to send the script as is to my instructor and add the scenario for the “novel version”.
After reviewing and contemplating the previous draft of the piece, I opted to drop this portion. I did this primarily because it conflicts with the character’s previous action of shuffling away (leaving the scene). After removing his retreat, I polished the piece to adjust for the change and it flows much better.
Thanks Karla- your response was a big help.